“I live my life fat and I have to navigate through a thin person’s world at all times, and if you want to do that without vocal ridicule from the normies, you’ve always gotta offer them empty reassurance that you’re trying to do something about your weight problem. If they feel like you’re at least sorry for your grievous offense of not looking like everybody else, they’ll leave you alone.”
- Kevin Smith
Back before I settled on a favorite baseball team, I supported the Pirates in their oft-failed endeavor to reach the World Series. They had some talented sluggers in Barry Bonds and Bobby Bonilla, but I always dug their crusty, mustachioed manager, Jim Leyland. Things change, and post-Sid Bream we all went our separate ways — Bonilla to (eventually rip off) the Mets, Bonds to
Tijuana San Francisco, Leyland to the upstart Marlins, and me to my stepfather’s Tigers.
When those Marlins somehow won a World Series, I was happy for the skipper. And when he retired a few years later, I figured that was it.
But then he came back. To MY TEAM. AGAIN. This is it, I thought. Now he knows what’s up. Now he’s gonna get it with the team I’m supporting. Finally I will have a favorite team not in the NHL that actually WINS something. (Because let’s face it, hockey doesn’t count south of about Philadelphia.)
But alas. And this time it looks like he’s retiring for good.
It’s been a good ride, Skip. Thanks for all your hard work.
trying to figure out the grammar of that store’s name
anime is are us??
Don’t make me stare at this for longer than I have to! It’s ungrammatical in error, not intentionally! You can’t turn that into a valid phrase in English! You have to just grit your teeth and look away! But by your calling attention to it, now I can’t!
I think this is my first official “DAMN YOU WILLIS.”
Pretty good fortunes, huh? Except they came to my KIDS. The two-year-old got the bottom one. WHAT THE HELL